Our trip downtown

 I put Esther in the stroller and we were off to the bus stop. Unfortunately the elevators didn’t work but at least we are just on the 5^th floor.  You never know how long you are going to wait for the bus it could be a couple minutes or 20 minutes. So as soon as I see the bus coming, I quickly fold up the stroller, sling the diaper bag on my shoulder, grab Esther, and make sure I have the bus fare in my hand. Even though it’s one of the beginning stops there still aren’t any seats. It’s definitely not easy (or should I say safe) to stand up on a lurching bus holding Esther and the stroller while I’m holding onto the rail…do I even have a free hand?! Fortunately there is always someone who will give up their seat since I have a baby. It takes less than a minute before sweat is already running down your back. They don’t really believe in opening the windows even when it’s 85 and humid. And if they do have them open, if they see a baby, they will close them b/c they don’t want the baby to get sick from the breeze. A good Ukrainian slogan would be "If you're not sweating, we're not satisfied!"  The bus ride downtown takes about 40 minutes. I am blessed that Esther usually does really well on the bus even when she is all sweaty. There was an old lady who sat down next to us and just talked away. She let Esther put her legs on her lap and went on about how good Esther was. She didn’t go longer than 15 seconds before she started talking about something else. I understood maybe a quarter of what she was saying to me. I was able to answer the few questions she asked so I don’t think she knew that I didn’t really understand much. I just prayed that I could minister to her by listening. It was wonderful to feel a breeze when we got off the bus. We walked around seeing all the vendors and then grabbed ice cream and went to the park. It was so nice to see a park that was clean with well cut green grass. You weren’t supposed to go on the grass but it was nice to look at. We also went into a big children’s store which of course Esther loved. They even had someone dressed up as Mickey Mouse! I couldn’t believe it. Esther just smiled and went right over to him. But when she started coming back to me and realized that Mickey was following her, she got this panicked look and quickly held up her hands to me.  All in all it was a fun day.

Don't Always Agree

The other week we received a box from Sarah's parents.  I was talking with the young man who delivered the box, and he was very curious about why we are in Ukraine.  I was able to tell him some about what we are doing, but I couldn't understand everything he was saying.  As I told him this, he nodded sympathetically and said (still in Russian), "Yeah, Russian is a debilniy language."  I didn't understand that word (debilniy), but I figured he meant it was a hard language so I agreed.  That word sounded familiar though.  Later I remembered that I had heard that word at an orphanage years before (it's slang), and it means "retarded".  So here is this guy I'm trying to witness to, and I agree with him that his native language is retarded and backwards.  Score another one for me.  I guess it's not always safe to be agreeable.

Daily Life

“Kindness has converted more sinners than zeal, eloquence, or learning.”  Frederick W Faber

I don't know who Frederick Faber is but we like this quote, especially since we have no eloquence right now!  We are starting to get more opportunities to relate to people and try out our limited Russian, which has been encouraging.  When we're idiots hopefully we can at least be kind, smiling idiots!

        A typical day for us starts with language school that lasts 3 hours. We study at the seminary which is about 1 ½ miles away. Sometimes we are able to take the bus and other times it breaks down and we walk. We live on the extreme northern edge of the city, so on our walk to language school we leave the city and enter a village. You always know when you're leaving a city because there is a sign of the city's name with a big X through it.  It's quite subtle.  Odessa is a city of about 1 million people, so there are many people from these nearby villages who come to sell their items at the renok (which is like a flea market).

After language school one of us goes to the store. We have to go to the store more often because you can only take back what you can carry and sometimes you are walking up to a mile with your groceries. I learned that one the hard way! Then we come home and unwind a little because your mind can only handle so much Russian. Because you walk more you are able to observe interesting aspects of the culture. Most people don’t have dryers so you either hang up your clothes on a rack or on a line in your balcony. Well, sometimes you end up finding pants, shirts etc. in the trees because the wind blew them off the line. The other day I actually saw a rug up in a tree!! 

     

Helplessly Trying to Help Others

We have been here for nearly 3 months now, and we are learning that missions is not all ministry and activity, sometimes it is waiting and prayer.  We expected this to a certain degree as it takes time to study Russian and form relationships, but this process has been more challenging than we anticipated.  For 2 years we prayed about being here, dreamed about being here, and shared that dream and vision with others.  It takes so much effort to get here and so many people give in order to send us that as a missionary you want to repay that investment.  You get to the mission field excited to serve and help others, and then you realize you are the one who needs help.  Help to communicate, help to figure out how to live here, patience and kindness from Ukrainians to help with loneliness, and help to even get an opportunity to minister to orphans.  It is a humbling process.
         
          While we know this phase will not last forever, the most difficult apsect of life here so far is the overpowering sense of uselessness we feel.  Being away from friends, family, & what is comfortably familiar can be difficult, but we would be much more willing to make those sacrifices if it immediately led to lives being changed and the Gospel advancing.  When that is not the case, the impatience and discontent that often lies just beneath the surface in our lives quickly surfaces.  Scarcely a week goes by that we don't ask ourselves, "Why are we here again?"  Then we remember that the purpose of this move was never going to be seen in 3 months, or 6 months, and it might not be seen by us at all.  Our job is to obey our Heavenly Father, and usually that obedience includes a time of waiting.  In my mind I was prepared to do great things for the Lord but not prepared to simply wait on Him.  However, as we were reminded recently by a pastor and good friend, waiting starves the heart of its idols, and teaches us Who is running the universe and Who is running our lives.  We pray this period of waiting and perceived helplessness will lead to a life and ministry where the excellence of the power will be of God, and not of us.
       

Earlier this week we got to see the transitional home Blagodat (Grace) Church is building for their orphan graduates.  It is huge, more like a small dorm!  It is 4 stories, and is designed so that each room is complete with a bathroom and small kitchen.  There are large rooms that could be used for Bible study & fellowship, movie nights, games, etc.... lots of ministry potential!  We also met Peter, an older Ukrainian (or in the prime of life for those of you over 50) who has been working with Odessa orphans for 10 years.  He showed us around and we discussed with him and Alfie (our team leader the possibilities of moving there in the fall.  We kept telling Peter that we are very open to that possibility, but nothing is decided yet.  That didn't seem to phase him however... as he showed us around he kept making comments like, "This is where you'll live, and in this room Gabe can lead Bible studies while Sarah brings the kids snacks."   When we asked him what the plans were for one large room he responded with, "Whatever you decide."  He seems like a very gentle man who is thrilled to have some help with this ministry.  We look forward to getting to know him better.  It is neat to see a church that has a heart for orphans, and that is investing so much in them.  We will continue to pray about where God would have us after our language improves, but it was exciting to see one potential ministry for us!

Balancing the Books

A couple weeks ago our heat was shut off.  We were surprised since it was only the middle of March, but fortunately it wasn't too cold.  A day and a half later it was turned back on.  Apparently Odessa was behind on its payments for heat to Kiev, so they just shut off the heat to the whole city.... 1 million people.  I guess that's one way to balance the books! 
    Our fun times at with language continue.... Gabe said he was born in 1880 and Sarah discovered the verb that means go clean the toilet.  Everytime we leave our apartment we are torn between wanting to make friends, and then thinking when someone approaches us, "Please oh please don't talk to me."  Gabe also got unanticipated language practice when he was cornered by a drunk outside our building.  The man liked Esther and said he always wanted a daughter but he just had 3 sons.  He said maybe we stole his daughter from him and kept asking which apartment we lived in.  Gabe pretended to not understand him (usually we don't have to pretend) and got away as soon as he had the chance.  You never know what you're gonna get!

Shopping in Odessa